Though bears often get the munchies, it appears they may be staunch opponents of wacky tabacky: A large bear trashed a marijuana growing operation in rural Garfield County, Colorado. Garfield County police raided the farm, only to find an abandoned camp littered with "pipes chewed in half, food containers ripped apart, cans scarred by bites, claw marks and bear prints and trees bearing claw marks."
"If I can find this bear, I'm going to deputize him," said Sheriff Danny Perkins.
Perkins said Deputy Bear left enough markings to indicate that he'd made enough repeat appearances to scare off whoever started the grow operation. Markings on trees well above six feet up indicate that the crusading bear was a huge one. Officers will dispose of 888 young plants and 4,000 "starter sacks" of seeds, chemicals and dirt.
"This particular bear apparently was not going to give up and basically chased these marijuana farmers away," he said.
Beware, aspirant wilderness pot farmers: Officer Bear is out there, and he's coming for you.
— Ted Alvarez