Hey girls: Have you ever been jealous that, unlike your male companions, you can’t pee standing up? Baring your bootie during inclement weather, or through multiple layers and a climbing harness can be a total pisser when trying to take one.
Full disclosure: This test started off as a joke. We’ve been barraged in recent months with press releases from companies who claim to have solved an age-old problem for women adventurers: How to pee standing up--without sacrificing cleanliness, frostbite, or time futzing with harness buckles while climbing big mountains. This blossoming category of gear seemed too comical to be true, but one female mountain guide, Molly Loomis of Exum Mountain Guides stepped up to the plate and agreed to dig deep into the world of “she-nises” (her words, not ours!) Over the course of six months, from desert canyons to the tops of snowy peaks, she and her team of three intrepid women mastered the art of peeing while standing. Here’s the scoop on the seven devices they tested, listed in order of performance.
Blitz Specialty Funnel
Forget about splashy marketing materials and girly shades of pink: For price and ease of use, this plastic funnel from the auto parts store can’t be beat. (Plus, a trip to the auto parts store will jumpstart your inner testosterone, which will come in handy when using these devices.) The wide mouth, angled cup and long funnel make doing your business a breeze. And the hard, plastic material means it’s easy to place and hold firm. Even through a harness, down pants, and multiple under layers, our testers were able to aim and fire in just seconds. Downer: It’s bulky to pack. $2; 1.3 oz.; blitzusa.com